Cult of Canyon

Cult of Canyon (COC) is a raiding alliance dedicated to spreading the word of our lord and savior, Canyon. We generously provide military experience to blaspheming pixelhuggers in the search for profit. Need we say more? Praise Canyon and all for which He stands.

To apply, join Cult of Canyon's Discord, go to #applications, and click the Apply button. You may yet be saved, regardless of background: noob, pixel farmer, or experienced raider.

These holy men have been handpicked by Canyon and his disciples. You must treat them with respect even when they are stupid, which is often.

Canyon - Our Most Holy and Only True God

SpAnKy - Leader and Mouth of Canyon

Panky - Head of Military Shenanigans

NotSad - Sacred Troll

TheAnarchyGuy - Deep Pockets of Canyon

No. For further elaboration, go to our Discord, find the #foreign-affairs channel, and click the Open a Ticket button.

Just remember that if you would like peace, you aren't getting it without a fair and just tribute to our lord and savior Canyon.

We reserve the right to counter for any member or applicant, regardless of perceived activity.

Delivered by the magnificent Canyon himself and censored appropriately

1. Thou shall never farm the land's pixels, for no true pirate has ever touched a hoe with the exception of Notsad's mother.
2. Under no circumstance shall a pirate show a pixel farmer mercy without being paid for it first, in which case thou shall call upon a fellow brother of the cult to immediately raid and extort the target once more. 
3. Thou shall emasculate, berate, and ruthlessly troll any raid target that initiates conversation in hopes of getting free peace, such that the next time a cult member raids them they will know to first offer payment rather than whining like a noob.
4. Thou shall revere the cult's shaman, he who is known only as Notsad of the Sacred troll, for each and every word he utters is in fact a nugget of invaluable wisdom disguised as the ramblings of a noob lacking a grasp of the English language and instead relying on drugs and Google Translate to converse.
5. Thou shall fear and respect the cult leader, Spanky the Belligerent One, for even when he has stupid ideas they are undoubtedly better than whatever traitorous alternative ideas you might have.
6. Thou shall never commit the sin of hesitancy to raid pixel farmers that belong to your former alliances, as it would be a disservice to them to deprive their members the rare opportunity to try defending themselves and in the process develop valuable milcom skills that they otherwise would have little opportunity to learn while pixel farming.
7. Thou shall strive each and every day to enjoy raiding as much as possible at the expense of pixel farmers and should never feel guilt for enjoying the game to its fullest by harvesting their salt as they chose to play the role of victim.  
8. Thou shall troll pixel farmer FA staff harder than anyone else for they willingly signed up for the job of trying to use worthless things such as reason and diplomacy to make peace with pirates, ensure that your belligerency is strong and that by the end of the conversation they are pissed off at their own member for even asking they try to talk to you.
9. Read the dang guides, lads. I mean seriously boys just read them or at the very least ask Spanky to hop on VC and read them to you like an abusive father telling his mentally stunted children a bedtime story.