Today, the nation of MSDPRUS Acacia reaffirmed its commitment to eradicating all weebs, in response to media opinions stating that the nation has gone soft on its main mission.
“You must go forth into the world, with passion, courage in your conviction, and most importantly be true to yourself. I did it!” were the first words from The Strump, President-for-Life of the nation. “Any negative opinions are fake news, just like the deep state's claim of LordStrum's sympathies to weeb culture. Sorry, people want weebs wiped off the face of Orbis.”
The Strumfather, noted labor union representative, responded to our office with the following quote: “If you have a lot of what people want and can't get, then you can supply the demand and shovel in the dough.” Our journalists are still attempting to figure out what that has to do with the price of tea in China.
Strumankhamun, Pharaoh of the Deserts, drew a bunch of pictures and ran off. Since he did not leave a message in an actual language, we have no idea what his comment is.
KingKek simply said “kek” and ran off. Sources wonder why he's still around when “kek” has not been relevant in five+ years.
LordScum offered to leave a comment, but instead ate everything in the office fridge and then passed out on the floor. The Acacian police have yet to comment on his arrest.
The Little Strummer Boy just banged his drum. He has no sense of rhythm. At all.
LordStrum, Keeper of the Royal Solitaire Table, was unavailable for comment, but was seen with a person named “SexyLad69” outside of a Best Eastern hotel. More to follow in tomorrow's article.
This has been Black Hole News.
