Were the Deer and Chicken the Animals, or was it the President? - 13/10/2096

Calling a Deer a Horse:

The Generalissimo Li Shimin, Paramount Leader of China, wished to maintain loyalty in the puppet government of the Republic of China he founded with his troops. Inspired by Zhao Gao, the ancient chancellor of the Qin Dynasty, he divised his own ploy similar to that of Zhao Gao's famous "Calling a deer a horse" story that birthed the Chinese idiom.

In the story, Zhao Gao wished to identify who in court was loyal to him. So he gaves his puppet emperor, Huhai, a deer and called it a horse. Those who called it a horse, he killed. Those who called it a deer, he spared as they were loyal.

The Generalissimo alone with but a deer on a leash, entered the portion of the Forbidden City where the People's Congress lies in the middle of a congressional session. He walked to President Xi Pufei, and handed him the leash. He informed the president that the deer was a gift of his, a horse. Before Xi Pufei could respond, the Generalissimo asked everyone if the "horse" was a stallion or mare. Those who said it was a deer were spared. Those who said it was a stallion or mare were killed.

The gifted deer being released into the wild again

His reasoning being that no one in the People's Congress was truly loyal to him, but those who said that it was a horse were knowledgeable enough to know the famous story and were willing to deceive and lie just to seem loyal. Those he spared, he reasoned, were less knowledgeable and in his mind less competent and less of a threat. 42 congressmen were killed.

The Protests:

The thousands gathered in Tiananmen Square to protest met a terrible fate. They were surrounded by recently arrived reinforcement troops. Residents within a 20 kilometre radius of Tiananmen Square were each given gas masks and evacuated. Once the safety of residents was ensured, the troops put on their gas masks as did the government and the Generalissimo. An immense amount of Sevoflurane was released to incapacitate the protestors. Within minutes, they were all unconscious.

A few seconds after the Sevoflurane release. Some have already fell unconscious

Afterwards, they were dragged into trucks and transported out of the city. The fates of the estimated 4500 protestors made up of progressive students, old workers, and dissident political groups, such as monarchists attempting to use the existing discontent to their advantage, are unknown.

Leadership:

Like the puppet president Li Yuanhong kicking out warlord Duan Qirui, president Xi Pufei after forming an anti-Li Shimin coalition and in a resounding success, convincing the CCP, KMT, and Democratic Progressive Party congressmen to vote with him, demanded that Generalissimo Li Shimin resign his position and give up his power, which would effectively strip him of power as paramount leader. This was made possible by the Generalissimo posing a threat to all congressmen except for his lackeys in congress.

His lackeys, a few congressmen mostly in the KMT, obviously voted against forcing a resignation and after seeing the unity of the anti-Li Shimin movement, left in a huff and informed the Genereralissimo, who resides in another section of the Forbidden City from where the People's Congress is, of the situation. The Generalissimo refused, and since the troops in the Forbidden Palace were soldiers who served him when he was a north-western warlord and thus loyal to him personally, he was able to refuse without repercussions.

Voting ... voting ... voting ...

The President, his cabinet, and around half of the People's Congress, were willing to flee and openly rebel. The many times the Generalissimo used violence and repression against the People's Congress and his willingness to purge the disloyal and corrupt, drove the CCP and KMT congressmen to flee and form an alliance. The congressmen who were members of the Anfu Club, a political club who's aims were to dislodge the Generalissimo of his power, left with the President and the club disbanded.

After announcing their rebellion and denouncing the Generalissimo on live television, they all fled with some provincial paramilitaries and politically affiliated street-gangs southward. Shortly after, the Generalissimo denounced the President and his supporters as rebels and terrorists and announced that since those in the line of succession if the president and vice president were both dead or resigned, he would take on the mantle and declared himself the Provisional President.

President Xi Pufei making his announcement

The aim of the President was to flee south to Hunan and form an independent Chinese government and in a guerrilla warfare campaign, take China away from the Generalissimo's autocratic hands. The President hoped he could use his connections as a member of an influential Hunan clan, families gained prominence in recent decades due to instability to a point similar to the old clans from before the Republican era of China, to gain a foothold in the region.

But this did not pan out as they planned. They did not form a separate government like Sun Yat Sen forming his Canton faction after disagreements with the warlords and president of the north, nor did it pan out akin to the Long March. The President was not a well-respected revolutionary who could leverage his reputation like Sun Yat Sen, nor a savvy political operator who could act as a general like Mao Zedong. He and his forces were ambushed and quickly defeated in a skirmish. The President, Vice-President, Congress Chairman, Chief Justice, and congressmen who supported them were all arrested while the ragtag troops who supported them were given pardon and their leaders shot in the head.

AMBUSH!

The arrested were put on a publicised trial, which they used to make a speech condemning the Generalissimo on live television once more. They were found guilty and were all sentenced to death. They were beheaded and their heads hung from the Tiananmen Gate.

Tiananmen Gate:

After the protestors were dealt with, the other main controversy in Tiananmen Square could be dealt with. Mao Zedong's portrait being placed on the Tiananmen Gate outraged the KMT, who demanded Sun Yat Sen's portrait be placed on the Tiananmen Gate. However after the KMT and CCP and Democratic Progressive Party rebelled, the discussion ended. It remained a controversy that people knew of, but more pressing matters existed. As a compromise the Generalissimo took down Mao Zedong's portrait and put no replacement portrait where it once hung.

Crowd developping to watch the portrait being removed

The Grand Canal:

The Grand Canal, a wonder of humanity. That China could create another construction of magnificence hundreds of years before is astonishing. It remains the longest canal in the world and much of it is still used for shipping. In order to stimulate the economy, create more jobs, and improve the speed at which transportation can be done, a project expanding of the Huitong and Middle River sections of the Grand Canal has been authorised. It is estimated to cost tens, perhaps hundreds of billions. 

The Grand Canal's many sections

The Republic of China, always intent on making all those who receive nourishment and care from society contribute to it, whether deserving or undeserving of freedom, has begun transporting Laogai and Laojiao prisoners from mines to the Canal to begin construction. Refugee workers who were lured to China in a system similar to the old Kafala system of the Arabian Gulf, will also be used for construction. This will save on labour costs. Workplace safety regulations have also been temporarily loosened to allow for those working on the Grand Canal's expansion to be able to work fast and hard. This will save time, which saves on labour costs.

Only the Best Chicken!:

On the 7th of October, there occured an outbreak of Salmonella in Shanghai. After a quick investigation, the source was trace and found to be a multitude of Popyes restaurants. This sparked outrage and has meant almost no one has gone to a Popyes. A large amount are being shut down temporarily for a health investigation.

It's empty now

One franchise owner was imprisoned and strapped onto his head was an electronic device to emit signals that meant his brain would release constant agonising pain without inflicting any physical damage. After two straight days of this while being fed from a tube, the man revealed that he cared very little for regulations and did not have his employees wear gloves or wash their hands. In his franchise, it was discovered after using a blue light that the entire restaurant, floors, ceilings, even cutlery, were covered in bodily fluids.

The owner of one of the franchises in Shanghai from which part of the Salmonella outbreak originated was allegedly interviewed while under drunk a few days after the incident. The man who alleged interviewed him released an audio recording that revealed t the owner's thoughts. 

Alright, interview's over. Your questions are dumb and everyone's been asking me them. !@#$ that !@#$. I don't care. Anything to save me a buck is worth it. I don't care if you got sick! I got sick as well! Shut up and let me enjoy a beer!

This statement was met with online responses and an online petition for the man to be deported. A few days later, the man released an official apology while also alleging that he has faced harassment and been attacked on multiple occasion.

As a result of this scandal, the Generalissimo temporarily shutdown almost all fried chicken restaurants for investigation. He did not shut down Chinese fried chicken restaurants, nor KFC. This resulted in an increase sales for the already popular household name of KFC. As no one got salmonella during the temporary shutdown, this has meant KFC has gained credibility and a reputation as high quality and delicious. KFC remains, in the words of the Provisional President that he said in an interview.

KFC is the best fast-food restaurant period. There is no better. Go to Chick Fil A, no sunday meal. Go to Popyes, you'll get Salmonella unless you eat that hunk of raw dough they call a biscuit. KFC has become intertwined with modern China. KFC is more Chinese than American.

The line to enter the KFC is no more. Just a crowd now

Minor Headlines:

• Absentee landlords seized of land
• Being an absentee landlord made illegal
• Limitations on how much land one can own
• Familial clans forcibly moved to far away, unfamiliar provinces to prevent entrenchment and nepotism and corruption in the provinces
• Surplus in organs for organ transplant surgeries
• Someone please tell me how to change the colour of these tables