Nation Bulletin

War on Zetenka

Down with the fascist Zetenkans, Crimea belongs to the Slavs

By Me
09/21/2023 08:46 pm
Updated: 09/21/2023 08:46 pm

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As international radio silence has nations wondering how the Ukrainians will react to Zetenkan threats against Russian/Ukrainian Warships in the Black sea, the Ukrainians have been steadily preparing for battle.

1.2 million soldiers have been mobilized to fight, 400,000 active duty homeland soldiers and 800,000 troops pulled off of border patrols in Poland, and brought out of reserve programs. In these days of silence these 800,000 slightly rusty troops have been given rapid training refreshers from their well hidden trenches located at REDACTED and REDACTED, and the other 400,000 homeland troops have been hard at work constructing strategic defenses and traps in Southern Ukraine making it near impossible for the Zetenkans armored divisions to make it through without intense struggle. 

Air defenses borrowed from the Soviet Fedaration were placed near air force bases and important city districts in the Northern Ukraine and Kiev, which has now climbed out of its power shortage.

The Attack:

The skies above Sevastopol were clear and the air force base had a beautiful view of the Ocean and beaches below, however at 12:30 PM this would drastically change as the sound of an explosion could be heard all the way from the Zetenkan capital building. News had reached the Zetenkan leader, the Sevastopol Air Base had been struck by a missile and reports of several more explosions were reported across the Peninsula, Zetenka was under attack and who else could it be but the Ukrainians and the Soviets. Brodcasts were sent out from Kiev stating the reason for this strike.

Colonel Tytovsky and the Ukrainian Leader step into the broadcasting camera

Governor: The nation of Zetenka has long been a black stain on the history of Ukraine, a stain that shall now be removed

Tytovsky: The Zetenkans claim that the Slavic people are responsible for the destruction of the "Germanic Empire of Zetenka" however this is a lie, we shall be responsible for the destruction of ZETENKA.

Governor: First this evil nation encourages discrimination of the Slavic peoples, the true owner of their precious peninsula, and they attempt to forcefully claim Southern Ukraine, failed due to their cowardice and incompetent leadership 

Tytovsky: they kidnap and sell our people to become slaves to another nation. And when we attempt to stop this, they provide protection to the slavers, UNACCEPTABLE

Governor: There will be no more chances, no mercy, Crimea shall return to Ukraine once again, and when this war is concluded, due to an agreement with Russia, I shall retire and due to sheer popularity, The Colonel here shall take my place and lead Ukraine into prosperity. Down with the Fascists

Zetenkan losses:

4 air bases have been severely damaged and over 230 aircraft destroyed by the Ukrainian missiles, however 5 of the missiles fired were intercepted by Zetenkan fighters and some bases were spared

 

Replies

Posted September 21, 2023 at 8:49 pm
Austria supports this war. Remove those who betray our glorious history and claim themselves to be Germans while actively betraying all what we have built for ourselves. Banish those who enslave others and never allow them to return. May Ukraine find itself victorious over those who proclaim themselves racially superior.
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Posted September 21, 2023 at 8:58 pm

Gran Colombia supports slave trade also...

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Posted September 22, 2023 at 2:44 pm

Official message from the South African Foriegn Affairs Ministry:

We would like to announce our support for the Ukrainians and we would like to assist the Ukrainians by sending 10000 Elite commandos from the 11th Rhino Division 

Ministry of foreign affairs 

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Posted September 23, 2023 at 10:45 am

"While previous administrations had supported the Zentekan administration, this new political climate demands new foreign policies. Now that the true colours of the Zentekan polity have been exposed, I feel deep regret for betraying old friends but understand the necessity to do so. We hereby condemn the rogue Zentekan government; but we doubt whether the lives of Republican comrades must be sacrificed in foreign military adventures."
-Press Statement By Supreme Winner Arun Sampath

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