CHOCOLATE FACTORY OWNER TAKEN HOSTAGE BY ANGRY GRANNY SOCIETY

~ Picture of the chocolate factory in the isle of Lewis..

For those that did not know, the Angry Granny Society or AGS is small but deadly mafia group that operates secretly and carries our criminal operations.   They are made up of 11 Scottish former tweed farmers who have used the name ANGRY GRANNY SOCIETY to create a deceptively welcoming and friendly impression. There criminal operations have been classified by investigators over the years to include.. extreme theft, embezzlement for other clients, kidnapping for ransom, evils against the crown and so on... 

They now seemly have there sights set on the likes of the largest chocolate factory owner in the islands. His name is timothy Wesley and  he inherited a small chocolate shop when he was just 19 years old. over the next 5 years he proceeded to change the small little shop into a factory where lovely organic chocolate bars and ice cream was produced and delivered all over the islands and western highlands of Scotland. He made a name for himself  as the "Cadbury of the Hebrides" and he made his family legacy famouse. Now at 25 years of age he runs his own chocolate factory and invents new flavors all the time. There is even a weekly chocolate subsection service that more remote customers can choose to opt in for. 

But just suddenly the lovely smell of chocolate stopped wafting from the funnels of his factory and all was quiet.  The Stornoway police received a visit from Miss Wesley, sister of timothy. She was very upset apparently and told them that she had received a strange letter that was signed by a lady called "Betty smith". the letter said that timothy had been kidnapped and was being held in the old ladies kitchen. the apparent "Betty smith" wrote that in order to get the factory owner safely back, the entire fortune of the Wesley family must be sent to the said address with no involvement of any one.

Sergeant Holmes knew exactly what this person "Betty smith" was all about. He said in his recent statement 

" as soon as we saw the name i knew. Those hooligans think they are very clever... but in actual fact they sometimes act as thick as a bunch of grandmas.. couldn't beat that irony!... The thing is, the name Betty smith is just too staged. Its just the most typical old lady down the lane name. even a toddler could guess it... so for me and my men, well we just knew and all had this moment when we looked at each other and knew what we was thinking "Yeah this is them... the Angry Granny Society!"

After this discovery it was decided that the police should take over the case entirely. No news has been heard yet of Timothy Wesley's safety and there is no news of what solution will come from this. 

Sergeant Holmes  gave some last comments on why he thinks the angry grannies decided to strike at this time... 

"distraction is the key ingredient needed for any criminal division to escape easier from things. and right now because of the queen marrying that evil bloke.. and the public being enraged about it... well i guess the climate perfect for a crime gang like the Angry Granny society to make a move and kidnap the most beloved chocolate factory owner... and those angry granny fellows are always pretty desperate to make some quick cash too"

he continued ... 

"sadly in the meantime the chocolate factory production is ceased and shutdown indefinitely . But luckily there are alternatives. For example you can find the perfect chocolate from the Ness dairy farm in Ness, Lewis. It is a small dairy farm but surprisingly despite there size they are the main competitors of timothy Wesley. They are always looking for ways to win over him, so therefore perhaps this kidnapping has created the perfect opportunity! Oh well, every cloud has a sliver lining after all!"  the sergeant then thanked us and then he went  off for his tea break. 

THE CELTIC PRINTING PRESS.