THE EARL OF YORK SPEAKS AGAIN

Next winter Her Grace Queen Rosemary is to marry her beloved. The Earl Of York confirmed the date just this week  passed. The statement was released and the public opinion was wild on the matter.

It has been well known that the Earl of York is perhaps the strongest force in The country. He is a man of means, and he means to take over our entire islands and rule over us and the queen as king. His future bride is very happy about this arrangements and recently made a statement that suggested that she will be overjoyed when her lover finally becomes the King of the place. some spectators even suggested that she might hand over the throne to him all together after the wedding. Crazy as this may seem in the modern era when women want to be in positions of leadership, it is very likely on this old fashioned island. 

Sir

Sir Thomas Berry continues and explains this old fashioned tradition...

Our Queen is a old fashioned woman and this means she is the type who will give up her position of leadership and hand over her crown to her husband. It is these old fashioned traditional ideas that still are embedded in her action and behavior. I sadly have no doubts that His Lordship, the earl of York and our future king has the last word on the matter too. She follows him like a foolish lamb most of the time and when he is with her... his word is too holy for her. Love is a strange thing and unhappily for us, our queen has become the slave of tradition and ,this arrogant wretch. 

• ~  Portrait of Our Graceful Queen Rosemary 

At the evening dispatch in Stornoway , We received a account from a local who attended a recent speech from the Earl of York. To further understand the type of ruler that will take over us and our queen... here is what the local recalls about the future king of our island. 

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"He spoke with a passion, a frown and deepness that pierced through the lands and ocean like a otherworldy gale that would not be broken. 

The future king of the islands was a powerful force indeed and we were all awaiting his command.  I looked down to the depths of the ocean and saw nothing but the ruthless, angry waves that were bound to keep me here. What type of man was to rule us? I thought to myself in a sad sort of way. I could not forget the jewels that gleamed in his black sparkling eyes, nor could i shake away the image from my mind of his furrowed brow, rouged with the cold of the winter wind and the angry sprawl of hair that sprawled across it .... His stature was grand, imposing and haunted .

He was a devastating sight. The romantic poets would have loved to write about him, and someday in thousands of years to come they will. They will write great mythic tales about the devilish king who ruled the wind beaten grey islands in the north. Some will call him a King of ice, other will title him The king of gods... Apollo is a name that suits him well. 

and yet for us mortals who bow beneath him, who look up into those dark eyes of doom... what will become of us? he speaks like a tyrant, yet the gentle lull of his voice reminds me of the waves of the ocean. They  have strength and can shake the world...and yet they tumble and fall and crush softly upon the pebbles and the sand. Would our future king be like this? 

Our good and graceful Queen is like a feather compared to him. The two are to be married in the winter of next year. A Queen such as her will bow fully to the kings will. There will be no Queen to rule us. Only the King will have a word.  we all know she is not the type to take the lead when tied to a man like him. Such a King will tear our nation apart... I am sure of it. His hand is too strong and firm... to ever let us go!" 

It is said that Queen and Future King  will make a public appearance soon... but until then we shall try to seek more information about this cold and stern king that is set to own us. 

Written by Stanley McDonald 

Stornoway Evening Dispatch