Citizens of Rason rated 'most miserable in the world' according to new survey

KAESONG - A study commissioned by the Rasonian government recently discovered that the country of Rason has been rated “most miserable in the world”.

The study was conducted by asking 20 people in each neighbourhood on a scale of 1 to 10, how much they enjoyed their life in Rason. Those 20 people would represent their neighbourhood, and the average of all of these communities was calculated. This was then compared to similar studies done to many other countries around the world, which found that Rason was ranked last, with an average rating of 1.2.

Dictator Justin Cheng, leader of the Democratic Socialist Republic of Rason, announced this startling news this afternoon himself. “I am very proud to say, that after all our efforts, we are now proven to be the most miserable nation on this planet." He then went on to explain his plan to get foreign nations to take pity on the discontent citizens and donate considerable amounts of resources.

The study also listed some possible reasons for these results. One was the seemingly random disappearances of citizens deemed “a menace to society” almost every day. Citizens complained that many of the people who disappeared were just regular, law-abiding Rasonians; however, when they were reached for further information, they were nowhere to be found.

At press time, Dictator Justin Cheng had no comment about the inevitable claims of other nations to be the most miserable nation due to them writing bulletins about the first topic that appears from a limited pool of random topics.

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