DEAR LEADER CAPSLOCKIUS THREATENS REPUBLIC OF PERUVIA WITH NUKES
CAPSLOCKIA, HAVING ENGAGED IN CONFLICT WITH SEVERAL DEPLORABLE AGGRESSIVE NATIONS IN THE PAST FEW WEEKS HAS DECIDED TO START THE PAPERWORK TO HAVE A MEETING ABOUT CONSIDERING A SECOND MEETING ABOUT USING NUCLEAR WEAPONS ON THE REPUBLIC OF PERUVIA.
ON MONDAY, 10/24, DEAR LEADER CAPSLOCKIUS SENT A GENEROUS OFFER TO THE INCOHERENT ROGUE LOWERCASE REPUBLIC OF PERUVIA. IN THIS OFFER, CAPSLOCKIA DEMANDS SATISFACTION, OR ELSE IT WILL USE NUCLEAR WEAPONS. THE CITIZENS OF CAPSLOCKIA CHEERED THIS NEWS. A FEW ANTI-WAR PROTESTERS MADE A SHOW, BUT THEY WERE QUICKLY GATHERED BY THE CAPSLOCK SAFETY POLICE TO BE SENT TO CAPSLOCK RE-EDUCATION AND COMPASSION CAMPS. WE MUST STOP THE SPREAD OF LOWERCASE AND ANTI-GOVERNMENT IDEAS.
THE WORLD EAGERLY AWAITS 4 MORE DAYS TO PASS, TO UNCOVER IF THE PAPERWORK TO HAVE A MEETING ABOUT CONSIDERING A SECOND MEETING ABOUT USING NUCLEAR WEAPONS WILL CONCLUDE IN A YES VOTE.
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INTERESTING. LUNA DOES NOT HAVE NUCLEAR WEAPONS JUST YET. WE'RE WORKING ON IT.
WE'VE BEEN HIT WITH QUITE A FEW, THOUGH.
WHEEZE