Legitamacy IN, Corruption OUT| OOW

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 Edition #2 Pg. 1

Orbis Orbiter Weekly

Orbis|Weekly|News|Objective|Comedy|Innovation|Vulcan

Hello again and welcome to Orbis Orbiter Weekly. If you are a little new that is alright you don’t need to know much. If you would like to look at our Edition #1 Intro Version, Click Here. As always, we are a longer bulletin publication, so feel free to skip to other sections! It is, in fact, encouraged. Remember to use our Table of Contents to locate your favorite sections easily. ENJOY!

 Spots are open on the OOW staff team check our Discord Server out for more info: OOW.com (Discord)

SPONSOR: 

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Table of Contents

Pg. 1- Intro, Ad, Table

Pg. 2- New Features, Main Story, Opinion

Pg. 3-(NEW) Economy Section

Pg. 4- Comedy Section, Like Goal

Pg. 5- The End

 

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Edition #2 Pg. 2
 

NEW FEATURES: We are proud to announce that a new writer has joined our team who has developed their own sections I hope, you the reader, will come to enjoy. Special thanks to Sultan Derent of the Parsedean Empire for their work on the Economy section! 

Another new feature is that we are now accepting Donations on our Discord. Anyone who is interested in giving and supporting us will be greatly appreciated (and hopefully in a little bit have some special perks on the Discord) no amount is too small, but everything is appreciated greatly. Link: OOW.com (Discord)
 

MAIN STORY: Legitimacy IN, Corruption OUT

Written and edited by: Riimen Riter 

3 Miles Outside of the Capitol Building, Holy Tomb, Vulcanities

Our main catastrophe tonight is something that has everyone, even the government, paying attention. Yes, that is right we are talking about the talks that have been taking place right now in our seat of government. 113 senators are talking over new legislation proposed by a minority party senator that has people up in arms. The proposal proposed by Senator Terven Ritton of the CNP (Change Now Party), has been widely agreed upon by the masses and may result in new seats for CNP in later elections. The move proposes a change to a legitimate government over the current Noocracy established by the temporary government of ‘77. The formal description of a “Noocracy” is a rule by the wise however, many people for some odd reason don’t think this reflects the current government. Now historically a change of government would have come about via the majority party likely proposing legislation that abolishes or renames the old government. However, thanks to Vulcanities unique political system an odd situation has come up where a one-man party is still able to hold sway and has the potential to change the government. Sen. Ritton (CNP) himself has even declared that “In no other country does the single man have the opportunity to be heard above the masses.” Well said, and a brave action taken.

Let’s look into this Ritton fellow a bit more though. Ritton was a landslide win in his small district as the opposition parties were all that was there after the early retirement of Vunar Cobell who was only 60 but had held a major political role for quite some time. After this shocking move major parties scrambled to find suitable candidates and failed to prepare leaving opportunistic small parties like the CNP to climb in. Running on a campaign of change now and explicitly stating that “Change must happen with our government; it is a shame to have a joke of a government standing outward while our real government has been stable and working hard. Give me your one vote and I will give you this one piece of legislation.” of course they had other policies, but these are mainly moderate. Rittons personal rags-to-riches story won many people to the cause, and this was a major reason for the victory. 

Taking a look at how other parties have responded we can see that the tide is turning in the CNP’s favor. Major parties such as the Roller, OVK, and their own ten-person minority party support this. Minority Party Lead Senator Jemethun Veneray, himself a strong supporter of this and the man who gave the deciding final vote, has this to say “While many people doubt the significance of such a diverse, and smushed together party I would say this is our strongest reason for significance. We have so many opinions here and it makes us a highly valuable asset, when cohesive.” While Veneray isn’t wrong his comments have yet to assuage critics

Major criticism has been heaved over by former ‘77 members and doubts have been casted as to what the new government label should be. Although the CNP has a listed label of “Democracy”, many people feel this is either, the wrong term or is too wide for what they see us as, while others believe in something very, very different. The strongest dissident being the VRD (Vulcan Royal Democrats) who believe in the restoration of the monarch under a constitution. Lead Senator of the VRD Sereran Coloot has been quoted saying, “...don’t believe those hog washers, the good people of Vulcanities know that to please Vulcan the divine right of the king and queen must be restored.” Other parties have decided to stay neutral. 

Thanks for viewing our coverage tonight and I hope you can enjoy your day despite us making it magnitudes worse. Remember to find us at Orbis Orbiter Weekly or to help the crew go to OOW. com (Discord) Stick around for our Opinions section where we go into depth with our friends Lead Sen. Sereran Coloot (VRD) and Sen. Terven Ritton (CNP). 

Opinions: Exclusive Senatorial Interview
 

[Riimen Riter enters Stage Left and finds his seat on the circular couch while applause goes, and a musical anthem can be heard in the background.]

Riimen Riter: Hello, hello, wow thank you all for coming out folks today we have something special for you. Please give a warm welcome to our first guest of the day joining us from call it’s Senator Terven Ritton. [Applause]

Sen. Ritton: [Faint electronic static] Wow, thanks a lot for having me. Sorry, I couldn’t make it in the flesh but it’s a bit busy down here in the THT. 

Riimen Riter: No problem at all, we're just glad you’re on the call. I have to say I was not expecting you to be able to do the show at all. I called our manager and said, “Hey, I wanna get someone real important today and it is not the president. I am looking for Terven Ritton.” My manager just sorta sighed at that point and said she’ll get on it. 

Sen. Ritton: I honestly would have been kicking myself for the rest of my life if I had missed this show. When I was a kid coming from this small village outside of THT I thought that was where I’d be for my life. My father and mother worked on a really small farm for one of the King's great-grandson's dogs. It was kind of ridiculous the kid’s dog required a whole field of profit to support its “royal needs’. Why that was the case was not our place to ask and I had a feeling it was really for a mistress who kept coming by to inspect our earnings. I mean when I was in that place, I didn’t realize I would one day end up on one of the most famous shows and papers. Dream fulfilled really. 

Riimen Riter: Wow, I am glad we had an impact like that. While the paper is not that old the show has been running for like 10 years now and it’s crazy the things, we have been able to achieve in that time. Anyway, if you wouldn’t mind, I am going to break up this very optimistic and joyful attitude and replace it with a more welcome companion of mine. So, my first question to you is why did you wait this long before making a move like this? I mean you did have a year and a few places in that year were places us news shows were struggling to fill with more meaningful news than this one I remember reporting on. “Dogs and Cats Are Starting to Find More in Common, Have Been Opening Barber Shops for Both Species at Rapid Rate.” Terrible show really. So why did you have to leave us in suspense is what I am really trying to say?

Sen. Ritton: Ha, the dog and cat thing actually sounds pretty interesting. But to answer your question the CNP and I really thought that I should just ease into the senate. Get adjusted a bit and learn the ropes of a magnificent place like this. I got to really know and appreciate my fellow senators. Lead Senator Jemethun Veneray is really just crazy talented for his age, and he really made the minority party feel like a power factor. After all that I decided I was ready and enough background support had been gained to pass the legislation through with the minority, and then the rest of the parties. It was a very awesome process to be a part of and I am very thankful that I have the opportunity to give my people a fighting chance with this stuff. 

Riter: Do you mind explaining the whole thing for us?

Sen. Ritton: Don’t mind at all. First off, we introduce the flaws and problems with the label of “Noocracy”. We mainly stated that it was degrading our standing within the international community. Next, we moved on to the evaluation of our current system. We found that we were very close to a lot of things in a few respects. Many people recognize the king as the official head-of-state but don’t see him as someone with power. We got to interview 25 people from each district, and this was the answer ~46% of the time. We found however when the system was examined, we were very closely related to a parliamentary democracy or just a plain democracy. Finally, we had to list our final conclusion which was a resulting thought in favor of relisting as a plain democracy. 

Riter: I see and what did the other roughly 54% say?

Sen. Ritton: There were too many different opinions on the king to list. Some want a regicide while others want the monarch to be deported to Siberia. Most of the sentiments were not happy ones. 

Riter: Just out of curiosity, I know this is off topic a bit, but where do you stand?

Sen. Ritton: Well, the media is well aware of my young self's letter to a friend stating I would like to see a formal execution. I have said this, and I do not deny it but at that point I was too inexperienced to grasp the implications. I will say now that I have thought it over. I am not opposed to this new idea. I have heard popping up saying we crown a new line of royals that are fairly just and make them the new figureheads of Vulcanities. It could even be someone from the same line as the king, just entirely different. 

Riter: Yes, the execution letter was slightly disturbing to read but it should be re-stated that you were under the system at the time of the letter's writing. Moving on though, one last question, do you think it will get passed?

Sen. Ritton: That is a difficult question to answer because in the system as we have it, it is hard to know where the wind is blowing but my current allies in the senate have been really committed to expressing the CNP’s message. I would definitely like to thank them, and we appreciate their continued support.

Riter: Well, that is all the time we have with you today, but I am glad your voice came by. Have a great day!

Sen. Ritton: [Applause] Thank you guys and remember Change can happen Now!

Riter: All right stay tuned folks we will be back right after this! 

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Riter: Alright guys welcome back! [Applause] Without further ado I would like to introduce our very, very, esteemed guest, Lead Senator Sereran Coloot everyone! [Applause] 

Sen. Sereran: Honor to be here! Truly wonderful. Slightly warm but otherwise very fine indeed.

Riter: Right, well uh thank you for meeting with us today Lead Senator. It is an absolute honor to have you here tonight and say what a night.

Sen. Sereran: Quite the night and quite the spectacle. Now let’s get down to business shall we. 

Riter: Sure, why not. So, let me start it off nice and easy, how did you get here?

Sen. Sereran: The question my friend, is why. Why would anyone in their right mind like to get here to the senate? Sadly, it was a question that in my youth and haste I answered with ideological fury. But jokes aside, I became a senator, and maintained being a senator after the end of the temporary government in ‘77, because of a will to see my once grand people united again. What better to unite all than a symbol for all to rally around. Plenty of other countries have a monarch who works as the symbol of a people. Also think of the boost the gossip industry will have. I am not saying by any means we go back to old times or anything such as that but rather I say we give a new spin to a shared history. I understand the hardships associated with the monarchy but also think of the good things the position itself does. My party believes in democracy, my party believes in freedom, we are not animals from the stone age. Believe me when I say that the people are the first waking thought that comes. It is for the people, by the people, and with the people that we strive for this goal. The Noocracy thing does need to go, yes but in what way. A democracy sounds well and good, but does it actually represent the people, does it unite the people, and does it give them something to be a part of. The answer is no. The new answer should be Constitutional Monarchy with the constitution being formally redrawn to incorporate sections for the monarch and their very limited powers. 

Riter: Wow, you make a convincing point but what do you say to the critics and even the people in your party who have started to say that sticking with the old monarch is a bad thing. They agree with your vision but see something different, someone different as the leader.

Sen. Sereran: First off, though, I will say this is off-topic and has a different tint than your other questions. I will answer it on the promise that you don’t go off this key topic again.

Riter: Ok, I’ll agree to it.

Sen. Sereran: Grand. Well, here’s the thing King Vulca- [slight gasp from audience at the saying of the king's name] oh don’t be worried I was touched (to be touched by the king is a symbol of friendship and lets you say his name). Well King Viniv Vulca the III [laughs at crowds' displeasure at the full name] is fully capable of assuming the kingship. What I am mainly concerned about is losing the sanctity of Vulcanities by losing the divine right of the king. Vulcan will not wait much longer for his heirs to be placed where they rightfully should be. If we switch to a different line entirely or switch to another member without killing him, we will lose the divine right. People of Vulcanities seek reason in emotion and find blood on no hands. 

Riter: Wow, alright then in keeping with my agreement I’ll attempt to stay on topic here, but I feel like you diverted the question back to the topic which was a first. What do you say to the people who believe keeping the Noocracy label is still a good idea.

Sen. Sereran: I would say that those people are the exact opposite of a Noocracy, honestly. Why would we want to continue to represent ourselves with some made up government when we have a very fine, and well-functioning one right here. We should be proud of our real government. Though the VRD and the CNP disagree with the new label we still have two months to work that out. We are very much on the same side when it comes to the scrapping of the new one. This Senator Terven Ritton is a very reasonable man and when I was introduced to him, he seemed to have a certain intelligence that sadly many others in our government lack. I am glad this piece of legislation was proposed because it got people talking about the issue and really considering it. He has thoroughly surprised me with how well he was able to promote and execute the label change and I look forward to seeing it come to its fulfillment. Now, I do have something to attend to so if you would forgive me, I must depart now. Many thanks to you and the OOW for inviting me today. 

Riter: Wow, we are really thankful to have you on today and hopefully you can stop by another time. Lead Senator of the VRD Sereran Coloot everyone! [Extended Applause] Okay well thanks for tuning in to the OOW today we still have a couple of more sections you can go ahead and check out. Special thanks to today's sponsor: Project Aequitas. From our capital city this is Riimen Riter checking out!

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Edition #2 Pg. 3

(NEW!) Economy Section

Written and edited by: Sultan Derent of the Parsedean Empire

Welcome to this segment of Orbis Orbiter Weekly! My name is Sultan Derent of the Parsedean Empire, and I am giving the economy report of the week! Let's start with the most boring to the most shocking.

First up, we have munitions. Always as dirt cheap, about $1800 but also going to $1700 sometimes.

Similar to iron, gasoline's price always hovers around $2700, rising to $2800 pretty often.

After that, iron. Iron almost never changes in price, always around $2600.

Then, we have uranium. Uranium is not as cheap, but almost always a round price of $3000, rising to $3100 pretty often.

Next, is oil. Oil has been at $2600 for the majority of the week but has dropped to $2500 not too long ago. 

Food, not too many changes, with only a $50 drop, at a $150 price mark.

Now we're getting to the interesting parts.

Coal has been on the rise. At the normal price of $2600-$2800, coal has gone up to $2900. In the future, coal is expected to drop, but may match uranium's price.

Lead, however, is almost the price of steel, while being substantially less useful. Prices range from $3800 to $3900.

Steel is very similar to lead but has been beaten by lead in price on some occasions. Currently, steel is about $3800, but is expected to rise.

After a huge slump in the price of aluminum, being almost $3200, it has finally risen. And rise, it did. Substantial growth has been detected in aluminum's price but has been hovering around the $3600-$3500 mark.

And finally, we have bauxite. An interesting case, bauxite is. Sudden surges or slight drops, you can never be sure. Bauxite currently is the most expensive item on the market other than credits and has a grand of $3900. The price has risen to almost $4000 on some occasions and has dropped to $3600, too. 

That’s all from me today and thank you for tuning into my economy report! You can get more information on the OOW at OOW.com (Discord). From everyone at the OOW Thank You! 

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Edition #2 Pg. 4

Comedy Section: Comic Comments!

“I thought only majority party senators could unsuccessfully get away with scandals. Oh well guess not”

Existential Crisis Helpline

“The Sushi was slightly raw and needed some flavor, the story felt like it had been made in an incinerator. As soon as I touched it, it turned to dust and left a terrible feeling in my mouth.” 

Food Digest (Ed)

“You know, this wasn’t terrible. Well as long as you ignored the main story, the opinions, that trash comedy section, and the table of contents.”

That One Guy Who Wrote This Comment at 2AM because he Had Nothing Better to Do, Magazine.

Like Goal: 15

(The Like Goal is meant to be slightly hard to reach but if you like and leave a comment and we hit our like goal you could get lucky and be the one who wins 1 MILLION dollars! *) 

*Only one winner who is randomly selected in the comment's wins. 
 

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Edition #2 Pg. 5

The End

Hey there, hopefully you’ve gotten a chance to check out your favorite stuff and are on your way slightly more miserable than before. That is fantastic! Before you go though, I would like to ask you for something. We here at the OOW are looking for people to run ads on our paper so we can gain some ad revenue to help create new stuff and pay our staff. The rates are really cheap at this point so hurry into the Discord. You can also help by donating or joining our team in a unique position fit for you! Thanks for Reading!

LINK: OOW.com (Discord) 

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