Popular Post Fraggle Posted November 9, 2017 Popular Post Share Posted November 9, 2017 (edited) From The Desk of Uncle Traveling Matt The Mighty Nation of Fraggle Rock Greetings to all the nicest nations of the world. And a hearty hello to the others. It has been a while since we have had time to write a message to outer space. I was away exploring new concepts and eating large amounts of strombolis. Filling? Sure. Delicious? Without a doubt. What is the best type you ask? Any that costs less than a hour of minimum wage and offers more than one container of sauce. Sometimes, a great place will offer something other than marinara sauce. I once heard of a place that had a special garlic butter sauce. Some day. Some day. I tell you what, two containers and a hearty stromboli? Sounds like something everyone could get behind. Well of course the gluten free crowd. the non dairy crowd, the non meat crowd, the non having a real diet crowd. So sure, it's not for everyone. No everyone can have delicious food stuffs. I get it. I don't look down on you. I don't pity you. I don't walk past you while you consume cow feed for lunch and giggle. I do none of that. I am above of all that. Why you ask. Because I am on my way to pleasure town with a stromboli and a few dozen containers of sauce. Sure I am not drinking the sauce like a milk shake. I can't do that. If I could, I would sell it to the masses. But we already have enough here. So let's move on to a few random musings. As I have been away, my Fraggles have been telling me stories about Orbis. I shall comment now. Stay tuned for the FFF program. 1) I see that The Best Nation Ever Seen is still developing its nuclear program. We have spent the better part of three human years (23456987654 days in Fraggle Rock) trying to perfect the missile technology. We have failed twice before and regret those mistakes. As we keep building nuclear weapons, for the better of the world, we need to make sure they work. So the third annual Fraggle Rock Random Nuclear Testing will happen in a few weeks. In the past, all ten of our nuclear weapons have landed inside other nations. I have a great feeling this year that at least sixty percent of our launches will not harm any nations. The best nuclear Fraggle tell me that our program has made great strides and I look forward to seeing their hard work. This year will be a bit different. Instead of a totally random process of selecting nations to launch our nuclear weapons over, we will be accepting bids from other nations to come here and point the nuclear weapons where they want. Now we want to set you up nicely here in Fraggle Rock. Our people live where they work. We don't want our guests sleeping in the farms or in the uranium mines, or near the oil wells. So for your visit to be memorable, we will need ten million dollars per nation, so that we can start construction on a grand hotel for welcomed guests. Now the hotel won't be finished by the time you arrive, but you will still pay us for the right to launch nuclear weapons anywhere in the world. Enjoy sleeping on the farms. Two) I don't have time to read much of what is said around outer space. Brief glaces tells me that a lot of nations are not happy with the current climate. I don't know the reasons, nor do I care. Stay away from us and we tend to stay away from you. It's simple. But I did have a thought the other week about how to fix the current situation. For a mere five million dollars, you will have direct access to me to hear my thoughts. III) My good friend and self proclaimed Uncle of Space has been doing a great job keeping things interesting around here. He has been trying to expand into different mediums, with various success. I have to thank him for trying. I know he gets bored with the day to day operation of a cult. I kid. No I don't, it's true. The demand to create new things is taking a toll. So he might be stepping away soon, leaving a hole in the universe. Fear not, as I will be here to hug you if you need it. His merry band of idiots are a welcomed thing around here. Without them, a lot of good people wouldn't be here. Please make sure to send him a private message and thank him for trying. He needs the attention. 2+2) I see the creation of new alliances and the failures of others. I have not much to say about this besides that I see it. X-V) Onto the promised FFF program. In the coming weeks, The Smartest Nation Ever will be rolling out the FFF program. Details will follow shortly, but the idea is simple. The FFF program will be a simple investing tool for other nations to profit. This is not a scam. Our scams tend to have flare and misdirection. The FFF program will be clearly laid out for everyone to try to understand. Lastly. I want to take a moment to thank you for reading this far. I know that it takes a lot for your attention to stay on one page. Heck all of this might be a ploy to get you to read something for four minutes so others can attack your nation. Well that's not the case. But if it were the case, it would have been great. But it's not the case. You are not being attacked. There's no conspiracy against you. Your personality is great and everyone loves you. It's not a lie if you truly believe it. Now go forth and let what you read sink in. Again, it's not the words you read, it's the space between them that matters. Always read more into everything and be willing to assume. We here in The Smartest, Best Dressed Nation encourage it. Take care of others and always look behind you at the same time. Feel free to contact us via email. Take Care, Uncle Traveling Matt Edited November 9, 2017 by Fraggle 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.