Confetti Floods The Meat Pit. Again.

Earlier today, confetti has once more begun to fall from the sky. This is the second time the party decoration has descended to us from the heavens. The effects were disastrous. Sewers were clogged, 3 year olds across the nation asphyxiated, and Party City, the beloved supplier of objects such as green army men (which likely will wind up in the lower intestinal tract of a bored adult) almost went bankrupt. We predict similar adverse effects as the result of our poor planning and frank indifference. The end times are nigh, the party has just begun, and our leader merely says "Let them eat cake.". Blood for the Blood God, Cake for his Birthday. All Hail The Old Ones.

Take care readers, and stay tuned. Coming up next: How to Know if You Can Kill And Steal Everything Your Neighbor Owns.